The upshot, however, is that in our survival schematic, to be liked enhances our viability on earth, and to be disliked actually exposes us to existential threat. It follows therefore that when describing anything that enhances our likeability, we will minimise the negative and exaggerate the positive. We will embellish. We will be circumspect. Expansive. Lyrical. Ambiguous. Etc.The end result will be information about ourselves that is not credible even before idiots, and inadmissible as evidence. Unless, of course, it can be verified independently.

In fact, if I were to attach some self-righteous moniker to my appellation in order to make me more credible, the opposite effect would be excellently achieved - suspicious. Say, eh, Eric Reliable Ng'eno. or E. K. Scrupulous Ng'eno. That will cause outright dismissal by the natural operation of the equal and opposite reaction. The question before my interlocutors would be: What is he hiding? Why is he getting on like that? What gives? That is suspicion. That is absence of credibility in front of you right there.

We all are alive to the fact that we are, as a country in some sort of transitory political dispensation. We, however, do not know where we are going, and whether we have taken the easiest or best route. But we are on our way. Transition is our subconscious motif, and is beginning to reflect in most of our actions. It is ordinarily accompanied by experimentation, like Alfred Mutua and his famous Highway Pebbles.

Now, we know that The Electoral Commission that is in place is interim. So it would, for purposes of terminological verity and in order to distinguish it from the outfit that turned off the light at the end of the tunnel, be apropos to name it the Interim Electoral Commission. I do not know about you, but I think adding Independent to it is a tad, err.... much? Independent Interim Electoral Commission. Quite a mouthful. Escalates letterhead printing costs. Tawdry and pretentious.

First of all, the commissioners sitting thereon were chosen by political parties. If you look at my earlier note, Miller vs Muli, you will see that the process of picking these kinds of people was nothing short of a delicate compromise by ethnopolitical constituencies. Is it, therefore independent? I do not think so. The internal equilibrium brought about by the check-and-balance of ethnopolitical interests may insure neutrality or a modicum of it. Independent, however, is a long shot. And if it is actually independent, why proclaim it so inelegantly? Is it the only independent outfit in this country? What gives?

If any purpose at all is served by the titular, or is it nominal proclamation of independence, what is it? Ought not other institutions also bear the 'Independent' tag?

Independent Safaricom and MPESA
Independent Equity Bank
Independent Kengen
Independent Mololine
Independent Kenya National Bureau of Statistics
Independent Ministry of Fisheries
Independent Chief Magistrate's Court, Eldoret
Independent Administration Police
Independent Dagoretti High School
Independent Constituencies Development Fund
Independent Office of Public Communications
Independent City Mortuary
Independent KTN
Independent Uhuru Highway
Independent Mwenda's
Independent Kenya National Music Festivals
Independent Kenya National Certificate Of Primary Education
Independent Olduvai Gorge Museum
Independent Nairobi Arboretum
Independent Town Clerk
Independent Luo Council of Elders
Independent Traditional Circumcisers

If all attributes of a thing are meant to be represented by the name, ought not that be on account of actual action and deliverables? Ought not the name be representative only inasmuch as it is evocative? What emptiness shall we confer upon the IIEC when they get into all sorts of mischief while still bearing a meaningless 'independent' on their name ?

If you think those questions are not important, consider this. The Bomas Draft Constitution was not a constitution. It was a restatement of our reform ambitions, proposals for better governance, paraphrasis of the entire body of statute law, covenants of petty political settlements, and a declaration of the mutual shared love of a million hypocrites. We crammed all our hopes, dreams, heartache, pain, tears and cluelessness into the damn document. It was a political and socioeconomic wishlist. It was a religious testament. It was a governance protocol. It was an anticorruption manual. It was a treatise on personal autonomy in regard to sexual and gender identity. It was a goatherd's handbook.

This clumsiness stems from a certain deficiency of elegance. When asked to design a logo, we immediately cram a surfeit of information into it. If it is of a girls' school, it will have a picture of a girl. If it offers sport it will have a ball, hockey stick and trophy. If it aspires to excel academically, it must also bear a mitreboard and scroll bound in ribbon. If it is sponsored by a religious organisation, it will have the appropriate religious symbol. At the end of the day, a girl's blouse will bear a plethora of diagrams of no artistic merit, and then a ridiculous motto, "Success is Hardwork. Discipline is Merit."

I think a lazy person finds vindication in graphically setting forth his ambition, then going to sleep, whereas the true achiever simply achieves, logo or no logo, motto or no motto, Independent or no Independent. As Wole Soyinka memorably said, a tiger does not proclaim its tigritude. It simply pounces.

And now I am told that there is going to be an Interim Independent Constitutional Dispute Resolution Court. Dear Goodness. Perhaps on Jamhuri Day, we will finally be properly declared the Interim Independent Donor Supported African Democratic Multiparty Republic of Kenya.


PS: The only other country that I have heard with an Independent Electoral commission is Nigeria. That is where Nigerians come from, is it not?

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