A wise person once said: “The problem with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.†It was recently brought to my attention that I have become a rat, a creature defined as good-for-nothing, parasite, rascal, and rogue.
Aggression is to Nairobi what greed is to a hyena—they both have an elemental aspect based on scavenging. Living peacefully in Nairobi requires one to learn how to clench fists and grind teeth, let alone looking like a rabid animal, ready to pounce at the slightest provocation. This is manifest in having a sharp tongue and using every gesture in a show of beastly antagonism. Raised on a steady diet of “turn the other cheek†and “love your neighbourâ€, this transmutation comes as a great surprise to me. The revelation began earlier this summer when, having gladly stuffed my backpack, I traded the fanatical pace of this city for a smaller town with “greener pasturesâ€. Three weeks into my stay, I found myself candidly declared public enemy number one by the town’s entire boda boda union. They claimed I had been rude. I counter claimed that I hadn’t been “rudeâ€; I had been “rude backâ€. After three weeks of having them make goat like gestures as they called me “mnattiâ€, I finally tired and turned my middle fingers on them. I bewail the days when I could have confidently declared myself Miss Congeniality; it would be betrayal of my nature to walk around with my chin buried in my chest trying not to be the basis of anarchy. Then there was this unsuspecting Maasai Moran who this weekend had the audacity to politely ask me to pass him a chair (I had happily availed some to several other people), only to be met with the response, “ulinioa lini ukaanza kunituma?†I can only say a silent prayer for the often blameless victims of my rampage. I however know for certain that I am not a big rat by Nairobi standards. This is evidenced in a series of signs posted on several unfortunate trees along Ngong Road: “Hapana kodjoa.â€; “Hapana kodjoa hapa!â€; “Usikodjoe hapa kabisaâ€; and finally with all the pent up frustration of an unheeded sign writer, there was, “Usikodjoe hapa mjinga wewe!†When I get to be that big a rat, I’ll put in an application to drop out of the rat race. Meanwhile “if you can’t beat them join themâ€, and perhaps strive to be the best (but not the “biggestâ€) rat you can be.
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Except that I every time ask for my (held) breath to return when I read a piece by Akitelek. Once again, sheer sparkling brilliance, and stunning perceptiveness of mind and heart.
Alexander