After much deliberation, I have come to the conclusion that Maendeleo
ya Wanaume is a group founded on and propelled by an ideology that sees
women as lesser than men.
At first glance, their agenda appears to be benign and progressive, but look again and you will be confronted by an ugly truth. They claim that their agenda is to safeguard the rights of men and to campaign for boys much in the way that other groups campaign for girls.
This is obviously unnecessary as men (and boys) are not persecuted in Kenya because of their sex – no lengthy, intricate explanation needed here. I simply have never heard nor expect to hear that a man (or boy) was denied a job or a place at school because on account of his sex.
Quite clealry, if you substitute man and woman for white or black and place this argument in the context of the US, you would be talking about white 'advancement' groups. Groups that claim to be for the "preservation of white culture or the rights of the white man" are clearly hegemonies in that they seek to continue to be 'superior' to other races and have either openly claimed so or are associated with groups that do. When the dominant social group seeks to 'protect' its rights, what it is seeking to do is maintain dominance at the expense of its subordinates. These groups are clearly labeled as hate groups and that is exactly what our Maendeleo ya Wanaume is.
So what is the organization's chairman Mathenge Nderitu Njoka really up to? A couple of possible explanations come to mind, actually several billion. Njoka may want his constitutionally guaranteed share of the billion shillings that was allocated to women in the budget. I can see your eye brows arching in surprise as you mouth the word "constitutionally guaranteed?" Yes, it's there, Chapter V sections 70 and 82 where it says an individual cannot be discriminated against on the grounds of race, sex, religion or ethnic background. So what's good for the goose, Njoka's group proposes is good for the gander.
Njoka argues that the provisions of the fund are likely to bring divisions in families between married couples and defeat the actual intention of marriage. He contends that a fund that seeks to empower and elevate women is likely to bring divisions in families and destabilise the setup of a traditional marriage… These words sound very familiar, do they not? They have been the global refrain of male chauvinists who blame the family breakdown on 'feminists'- funny how a progressive emancipatory concept has become a derogatory epithet across the world. Women have been mistreated in marriages for centuries so now that we are standing up and saying no more we are threatening the very families we have slaved to build up all our lives? Why don't these men try treating their wives as human beings who deserve respect and see if their marriages will break down!
I may be wrong but I would almost bet anything that Njoka and his ilk are of the school of thought that women are their own worst enemies. Girls are taught to view each other as competition from a very early age. While healthy competition between boys is often encouraged in team sports and in activities that offer stable group dynamics, competition between girls is fostered in an individualistic manner; for one to win the other must loose.
Your average girls is eternally held up to some unattainable ideal and the notion that if she doesn't reach it and maintain it, she will not be a true woman is reinforced. So the girl is taught that she will have failed her family if she is not this perfect ideal, and this dogma is reinforced in endless reminders, scoldings and kitchen chats from a very early age. The fear of being inadequate is never more evident than in young adult women, who are trying to create a life for themselves. Our parents, our culture and even the media dictate terms that must strictly be adhered to in order to be a 'good' woman.
"If you don't learn to cook, you will never get a husband," says my mother.
"If you don't stop talking back you will never keep a husband," says my father.
"If you go too school too long or maketoo much money and are independent, you'll scare of any husband," says my culture.
"If you don't lose that five pounds around you midsection, no one will ever find you attractive," says Cosmo.
It is of utmost importance that women strive to set themselves free from these cages that they set up around their lives. These bars give succor to their oppressers and couched in the language of family and tradition, promote the efforts of such groups as Maendeleo ya Wanaume. Women's rights are human rights it is true, but the campaigns of such groups as Maendeleo ya Wanaume make a mockery of the very real trauma many women live through. We have to change the way we raise our daughters, we have to teach them their intrinsic value – advocating for women's rights automatically evolves to human rights; in an ethical Kenya, there is no place for Maendeleo ya Wanaume.
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Watching the news polls our TV houses give us everyday, they had one last Friday night when both KTN and NTV asked if women deserved the extra 50 seats that Karua suggests that they should get. Not remembering which one it was, the end result was 68% of respondents said NO whilst only 32 agreed that women deserved the seats.
Prior to the poll result, my family of three where I am outnumbered 2 to 1 on the gender side, also carried a poll and my teenage daughter and I voted that women do not deserve the extra seats. A perturbed mother turned to the daughter as to why she should vote with me, and the answer from my daughter was a surprising comment that " women are their own worst enemies". She went on to quote women numbers in our country and why women do not vote for their own when there are candidates of their gender. So I added in that women must surely know that those from their gender who aspire for the political positions cannot be good leaders and consequently do not deserve to be elected!!!
So this Maendeleo ya Wanaume thing (which does not represent me!) cannot be just a vehicle to further marginalise women. If my daughter's argument is true - then we actually may just need such a movement for there are many marginalised men in our society!.